10.11.2004 || 12h58

A short, sad country

So, Morrissey's new album's not totally sucktacular, the Artist Formerly Known as Cat Stevens re-cut an old anti-war saw, and Duran-fucking-Duran's on the UK Top 5 for the first time in about four centuries. Quick, someone tell Peter Gabriel and Kate Bush to pull a duet so my life can be complete.

But Terence Trent D'arby gotta stay home, youknowwhatimsayin'?

Oh, apparently Ottawa doesn't know yet whether selling us four sub-standard pieces of submersible shite is actionable. I'd just like to toss in on this one: it is my opinion that the Canadian Forces, acting as representatives of themselves, their staff and employees, the injured parties and the people of this benighted country sue the Red Serges off the transatlantic parental unit for this outrageous display of Culpa lata.

This probably won't happen, of course. Two military enquiries into this thing. Two. I can already tell you what will be the result: The subs met the requirements of yadda yadda this and yadda yadda that. They might throw in a little human error just for good measure or concoct some natural whizbang to take the heat off the mother country, which will bring the list of nations that suckerpunched Canada in 2004 to (with annotations):

  • The United States (softwood, meat, Maher Arar, Star Wars missile defence stupidity, Harry Schmidt's deal to escape the consequences of his 2003 bombing of Canadian soldiers in Afghanistan... the list goes on, actually)
  • Syria (Maher Arar)
  • Iran (Zahra Kazemi)
  • Denmark (fisheries disputeó though we actually *won* that one, Hans Island)
  • Nicaragua (football/'soccer' tie that has essentially knocked us out of the next World Cup)
  • Russia (a certain hotel chain fiasco)
  • The UK (Those four freaking *subs*)

You see, the problem is that we keep accepting shite like this. We've reduced our national sense of self to nothing more than a wheezing health care system. We've forgotten what it was that made Canada a medium power for so long. We went from being the world's peacekeepers to being something like 38th on the list of nations with the most blue berets out there, we've starved our military to the point of almost total irrelevance (stuff like JTF2 and strangely, the navy aside), we've allowed some international reversals for which certain former Prime Ministers (*ahem*Trudeau*ahem*) are probably spinning in their graves, and we've even sucked all the hopes out of our olympic-class athletes. Hell, we can't even be seen by the rest of the planet as the US's whipping boy now that Australia's put that particular collar on... okay, so this isn't *all* bad, but give me a break.

Yay us: people beyond our borders finally know that we have musicians and writers and filmmakers. Good thing, too. Otherwise, we might have drifted into complete obscurity.

This message of national irrelevance was brought to you by too much tea; a familyless thanksgiving; the letters C, B, C and the number Big Fat 0.

||Gods save the Queen,

back || forth

older shite

One last little note... - 09.21.2006

de-stressing, biking and terrorism - 06.06.2006

Mildly stressed... - 05.29.2006

More crime stupidity - 05.28.2006

Scary stuff - 05.25.2006

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