09.06.2004 || 01h16

bones and flesh and doctors and crap.

Okay, I give up. I'll make an appointment to see someone about my freaking hand. I tried to play a little bass to-day and ended up gasping for breath because it hurt so much. I was surprised, really. I'm not in constant pain or anything, so I was totally shocked by the intensity of it. it's just that one sort of position and pressure, I guess. I don't know...

I also don't trust the doctor who directed the placement of my cast. She kept looking at the X-ray and telling me about this little chip off the upper umbral theorydimide and yadda, even though I was pointing to the knucle and saying 'but it hurts like hell *here.*' I wanted to shake her and say 'listen to the human being whom you're writing off as a statistic for a second!

The knuckle in question looks totally wrong now. If they have to re-break it, I'm going to hunt that doctor down and remove a few of her digits myself.

But really, the big question that bounces around in my head is hyper simple: why is this happening to me? I was being careful. Why am I being punished when the reckless bitch who did this got off without even stopping to help me?

That's the thing that I've been trying *not* to surender to for this whole time. All wrapped up in a blanket of band-related guilt and the simple nagging pain is the utter bewilderment I felt after that first bone-crunching second, when I was sitting on my arse next to the wreck of my brand-new bike and watching that girl just pedal off. The bewilderment hasn't gone away, it's just taken on an ugly edge.



||Gods save the Queen,
||cf

back || forth

older shite

One last little note... - 09.21.2006

de-stressing, biking and terrorism - 06.06.2006

Mildly stressed... - 05.29.2006

More crime stupidity - 05.28.2006

Scary stuff - 05.25.2006



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