11.02.2002 || 12:55

my first post-new years post

01 Nov 2002 | 11h24
Hm. Snowing outside. From in here, it looks almost poetic. I know it's not: that's Crescent Street out there, prowling ground of the Parasuco Bump 'n' Grind set. I'm at work an hour early because I know that here I can get work done, whereas when I'm home, the presence of my sweetums tends to make me snuggly and randy. Heh.

So, I went to the bank this morning to see what I can do about my loan payments. I also dropped off a CV at a photo store. Probably no luck there, but what the hell.

I tried to apply at a local publishing company as a copy-editor, but apparently 'No current postings' really means no goddamned postings. Oh well [exhausted giggle].

On a lighter note, I'm almost done the fricking short story I've been working on for the past six months. No idea if it's realistic or even readable at this point, but we'll see...

See, this is the first day of the new year for me, and I see it as maybe a new beginning or a second chance or something. I know that John Ralston Saul would prolly call me a goof for that because it's just another false start. I think he's right. But the nice thing about all these fake little new beginnings we launch is that they work as symbols, as launchpoints for the changes we want to make.

Hell, It's 12h00. I guess I'd better go stock the beer fridges. Just another day as a fricking busser...

02 Nov 2002 | 12h32
You know, all that about false new starts reminds me of the spaniard Ignatius Loyola. Here was a womanising dandy with a knack for combat and drinking, whose life was changed when a cannonball landed between his legs, crushing both of them. After undergoing all manner of surgery, he limped his way towards god by way of walking into towns and preaching. He brought people into the fold not by appealing to their emotions the way most preachers did, but rather by applying logic to the question. As he went on, gathering followers, he was denounced to the Inquisition. When he found out that he'd been denounced, he marched up to the Head Inquisitor's office in whichever city he was preaching at the time, and demanded that he be tried and exonerated immediately. The Head Inquisitor asked to see a copy of Loyola's book, and declared it to be free of heresy. He asked to keep a copy, though the actual reason was so he could examine it for heresy at his leisure, and told Loyola he could go on his way. Loyola went and got a notary, and had the Inquisitor repeat officially that there was no heresy in Loyola's book. In doing this, Loyola used the Inquisition's own methods to save himself. He went on to become more powerful, and gave the world the black-robed Jesuits, who weren't always much better than the damned Inquisition, but that's a different story.

Ralston Saul, when talking about the false nature of new beginnings, is generally referring to the western world-spanning 'new' ages. The Renaissance, the Age of Enlightenment, the Modern era (which ended with a world war), Post-modernism... Stuff like that. I tend to think that what is true of the world is true, in a microcosmic sense, for individual people as well.

That being said, 31 October 2002 marked the end of one phase of my current dilemma, and sparked the birth of the next. I'm no longer going to curl up and get all stressed about my lack of funds and plethora of bills. I'm into the problem-solving stage now. I'm still not sure how well it's going to turn out, but I know it will, in the end, turn out.



||Gods save the Queen,
||cf

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older shite

One last little note... - 09.21.2006

de-stressing, biking and terrorism - 06.06.2006

Mildly stressed... - 05.29.2006

More crime stupidity - 05.28.2006

Scary stuff - 05.25.2006

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