2001-04-13 || 2:41 p.m.

Deaths

The Rune Eihwaz is the Yew tree, which is associated with Death. This association is nothing short of ancient. the Archer God Ull used to live in Ydalir, hich was the valley of Yews. The tree keeps its greenery through the dead of winter, and was used extensively by Germanians for making bows.

Eihwaz is the thirteenth Rune of the Futhark. It sits smack dab in the centre of the Runick alpabet, and here is where the heaviest meanings of the Death Rune come in: Death is not an end in and of itself. It is a major change. There are kajillions of little deaths that we go through in our lives. Some change us for the better, some bring us down or make us bitter. Some are sense less and unneccessary, brought on by our own stupidity.

Two of my major deaths have come at the end of relationships I saw as being permanent. Another came at the realisation that I don't have what it takes to be an artist. I gave up and went into computers.

I died when I realised that I will never change the world.

These deaths have not ruined me. I have taken as much from each as I can, and try to live a better life with each lesson. I don't know if I'm succeeding. Sometimes it feels like I'm failing miserably.

I woke up and died this morning. I can't talk about it yet. The blood of the old me is still too fresh on my pillow.



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older shite

One last little note... - 09.21.2006

de-stressing, biking and terrorism - 06.06.2006

Mildly stressed... - 05.29.2006

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Scary stuff - 05.25.2006

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